Funny Brew Haiku & FWOD - My Dentist Story

So I went to the dentist the other day for the first time in like 5-6 years (fucking brilliant, I know) And they shoot me full of Novocaine so I can't feel 'em stick their dicks in my mouth... so they do the little cleaning thing etc... I leave and decide with my mouth still numb that I'm going to Subway to get me a sammich. I get home, plop my fatass on the couch and start enjoying my sammich... I get about two-thirds of the way through, and realize that they're are some little red splotches on my sandwich... I think... well that's kinda fucked up... what did they do to my teeth?! I finish eating my bloody sandwich, and start touching my lip... well there's just too much for this to be normal... I get up go look in the mirror... detective Don... on the scene... I guess eating when your mouth is numb isn't a good idea... as you might gnaw your own face off... my lip was bleeding like a mofo. I guess the moral of the story is don't chew when numb.

-Dentist Haiku-

Metal scraper thing,

most god awful sound maker,

torture in my mouth.

-Fwod-

Sammich - laziness at it's best... because it takes just a bit too much effort to say "sandwich" ...*insert ethnic humor here*